The guy that came in with a gunshot wound to his left hand: “I pulled out the clip and checked the chamber it looked empty. When I pulled the trigger, it went off. I guess there was a second round in the chamber.”

Triage nurse: “That’s not how that works.”

A woman has her two kids with her. One called the other “gay.” The mother, indignant, told the daughters: “Don’t talk like that, it’s offensive. Your uncle is gay, and when you say things like that, you sound like Donald Trump.”

Nurse to the cop who was involved in a pretty bad crash in his patrol car: “Were you wearing a seatbelt?”

Cop: “No. I don’t care that you know, they are going to find the ‘seatbelt dinger preventer’ that is in the seatbelt latch, anyway”

I guess some people ARE above the law. I wonder how many seatbelt tickets he has written.

Categories: Uncategorized


it's just Boris · May 11, 2024 at 9:52 am

I need to find that seatbelt dinger preventer thing for my in-laws. They’re around 80 years old, still okay to drive, but flatly refuse to wear seatbelts for anything other than “long” trips (e.g. 100+ miles). The last time they shopped for cars, part of their selection basis was how long before the “dinging” stops.

Since I can’t convince them to change, at least maybe I can keep the wife and me from going batty when we ride with them. (They won’t put seat belts on in our cars either, so, we simply refuse to drive them.)

Side note: I view seatbelts sort of like I view motorcycle helmets. I believe it’s a personal choice as to wear / use one or not, and shouldn’t be mandated by law. That said, I always choose to wear a good one, and except in the case of emergency I refuse to carry a passenger who’s less protected than I am. (I don’t want the liability, or the ticket depending on the jurisdiction.)

Steve · May 11, 2024 at 10:32 am

The cops not wearing a seat belt goes right along with the cops not obeying the speed limit. No tickets there, either.

    TRX · May 12, 2024 at 9:44 am

    Or in some states, texting, talking on their cellphone, or other activities forbidden to their theoretical employers.

    My state passed a no-texting law, but the bill for “no phone use while driving” sank when some of the legislators started asking if that was going to apply to the police, too. The State Police said it would be OK for them to do it because their officers had “special training.” A couple of the congressmen asked what that training might be, and how they were going to arrange for private citizens to get it, too. Which caused considerable consternation and outrange among the JBTs. So far, they haven’t managed to persuade the legislature to pass a bill. Interestingly, it seems the State Police are the only ones who are hot on getting such a law passed.

Don Shift · May 11, 2024 at 3:31 pm

His medical records will indicate “unrestrained.” Dumbass.

    Divemedic · May 11, 2024 at 5:50 pm

    My intake note said: Patient states that he was the unrestrained driver in a t bone type collision to the passenger B post with air bag deployment. Patient denies LOC, n/v, neck pain. He does complain of abrasions to both arms and face, pain on palpation to his left rib cage, and a burning sensation in his eyes. A/Ox4, pink, warm, dry. Lung sounds vesicular without adventitious sounds. Bowel sounds active x4, no tenderness on palpation. PMS is intact in all extremities. No seat belt marks found on exam. NIHSS score is 0. GCS is 15.

      Dan D. · May 11, 2024 at 9:18 pm

      I enjoy the days when my own GCS is that high.

      Don Shift · May 11, 2024 at 10:19 pm

      BEAUTIFUL! Oh man, I know all about that stuff. Good luck to him lying to his insurance/WC adjuster. I’d go on but PERSEC.

jimmyPx · May 11, 2024 at 5:49 pm

For the life of me I don’t know why people are so stubborn about seat belts.
Go on a ride along with the rescue squad and you’ll quickly compare the shape of people in accidents wearing seat belts and those who don’t.
Yeah, I don’t like the .gov telling me what to do either but wearing a seat belt can save your life.

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