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I-95 Goes North *and* South

Because we are so depleted by COVID positive employees having to stay home, I had to work a 16 hour shift yesterday (the most we can work under hospital policy) and I got off work at 3 am. I get 8 hours off (the least we can get under hospital policy) and I go back for another 12 hours. That isn’t the point of this post.

For the last several hours of the shift, I worked with a pair of women that I have never worked with before. Both of them are from New York City. They spent the last two hours of the shift comparing New York City to Florida. This is what I heard:

  • The people here are (and I quote) “Backwards, backwoods hicks”
  • The schools in Florida are awful and don’t teach anything. They can’t understand why the schools don’t teach anything. NYC schools are SO much more advanced
  • You can’t get good Chinese food, Pizza, or baked goods here
  • One complained that the stores here didn’t carry her specific brand of orange juice that she liked.
  • There isn’t much to do here. It’s boring
  • The shopping here stinks.
  • They pay here is low, and employers expect everyone to get by on peanuts
  • They both said they spent their first two years here crying nightly because this place is so awful.

Here is my answer to all of that:

You took Interstate 95 going south to get here. Did you know that the same highway goes north as well? You can always go back. I’m sure, with it being so great and all, you would be much happier.

Here is some advice to those of my readers who would want to move from places in the north to places in the south:

  • The people who live here don’t appreciate being called backwards, backwoods, hicks, or any other names. Your new neighbors won’t like you much if you denigrate them.
  • The schools in NYC aren’t any better. Actually, Florida and New York schools are fairly comparable.
  • The food here is fine, just made how we like it, and not how you like it. Just like you don’t prefer the Chinese and pizza here, I can’t find good biscuits and gravy, Bar B Que, or fried chicken in NYC.
  • This is Florida. There are dozens of orange juice brands here. Many are locally produced. I’m sure that one of them is to your liking.
  • There is plenty to do here. Florida is a popular tourist destination.
  • Have you heard of Amazon? Besides, how can people in NYC shop? Haven’t you been locked down for two years?
  • The pay is lower than NYC, but taxes and the cost of living are much higher. Here in Florida, you don’t have to pay $3,000 a month for a one bedroom apartment. We also don’t have to pay 15% state and city income taxes.
  • If you really are miserable, go back where you came from, but stop trying to make here like there. You left there for a reason.

This is the attitude that people from New York City are famous for. It’s why most of the people in the rest of the country don’t like New Yorkers. You are arrogant, loud mouthed, and insulting. If that is your attitude, STAY IN NEW YORK.

Rant over.

25 replies on “I-95 Goes North *and* South”

Tell them to GTFO on back to DeBlasiostan.
The time for nice and go along is over.
Niece works as nurse at local religious hospital and she has had several false positives from the hecho en China test kits.
Thank you for healthcare service.

Ugh, people like that really annoy me.

Why didn’t they stay in NYC then? I bet they couldn’t live on what they made there… If it was really so great, they wouldn’t have left!

“If it was really so great, they wouldn’t have left!”

Precisely. And for some strange reason, they don’t like being asked, if that’s so, why they left in the middle of their it’s-better-there whinefest.

That’s what I call a Completely Unhinged Narcissistic Twat. And rather than send them back to Noo Yawk city to continue their incessant bitching and screwing things up, have them disposed of in one of the swamps Florida is famous for. Gators gotta eat; too.

Excuse me? Look friend, we don’t let them fags from new yawk fuck your steaks while they are growing in the pastures here, please don’t pollute the gator meat.

Bert, my bad. I should’ve just sugggested a hazmat incinerator. These two meet the definition of medical waste.

I just thought of a possible solution.
The lefties like importing folks from various armpits of hell, why not sneak em in a planeload of frisky cannibals?
Halloween is a bit far off but the first of April be right round the corner.

You sir are so much more polite than I’ve become. I’m beyond GAF. I’m beyond listening or caring.

I just smile and tell them GTFO then

Ah, good old “View of the World from 9th Avenue”! Everything outside The City is a vague wasteland, with the occasional tourist landmark.
Most of the things I used to like around Silicon Valley, and that I would expect to miss here in Tennessee, were disappearing anyway: little low-margin businesses just can’t survive there, so quirky little shops and tech-surplus stores alike were pretty much things of the past. And that was before the Pestilence and the unfettered reign of Darth Noisome!
That leave some specialized social gatherings (which were mostly dying out long before the Pestilence killed them off), and… not much, really.
Heck, even Fry’s Electronics is gone now.
My new home may not have the same amenities I was used to, but neither does the old area anymore, and the new area has its own amenities, which are still there and show no imminent sign of being shut down. Also, this state’s politicians don’t hate me, which is kind of a big deal.

I miss Fry’s. Their store on Porter in Palo Alto got me through grad school – a one stop shop for lab electronics & parts.

I miss Fry’s. It was a miserable shopping experience, usually. Just like Microcenter is for me today. But since Radio Shack blew a bearing, you couldn’t find electronic pieces parts anywhere.

For decades I’ve told asswipes like those “I don’t care what you think it is/was like back home, if it was so good you wouldn’t be here spouting crap, either go back north or shut your pie hole. Either way we don’t have to listen to your bullshit.”

The only thing I’ve heard at least a thousand times from New Yorkers that wasn’t in that list of the reasons they hate Florida is, “they roll up the sidewalks by 9PM”

It is Orlando, though. Probably more nightlife than the places I grew up.

LOL. I’ve heard that too. Ybor City is quite lively until 2 or 3 am. So is the Downtown Orlando scene, as well as City Walk and a few other places.
Still, if you are over the age of 30 and are still partying until 2 or 3 in the morning on a regular enough basis that you need to live in a big city in order to party, you need more than a change of hometown.

If you draw a line from Belle Glades up to Orlando you have it. I-95 people go to the east side, I-75 people go to the west side. The I-95 side has the New Yawk/New Joisey asshole/scumbags, and the I-75 side has Ohio/Michigan/et al. people and the like (so called “midwesterners”) including the friggin’ Canadians. As it turns out those midwesterners piss on the New Yawkers as much as crackers down here.

Miami-Dade is merely a third world country now, so that doesn’t count anyway.

We don’t go to the east side for anything, and *they* don’t come to the west side voluntarily.

As for the nurses, yeah, there aren’t as many 6-figure-earning RN’s in FL as in the northeast, because economics is a thing.
Guys driving big boats in FL make about 1/3 less than I do in the northeast for the same reasons, so I fly 1000 miles to commute to NY for work.
Fun fact: I can get from my boat in Brooklyn to my home in S. FL in the same time my boss can get from the office in Brooklyn to his home on Long Island.

One of the worst things you can do here in Texas if you are a yankee like that is expound on how it’s done in the big city.

Not to long after I got here (over 20 years ago), My boss and I were out to dinner, and I was telling him how we ought to do things. I forget what exactly it was about but I remember his reaction.

“Well, if you don’t like it, right there is I-35, go north on it and get the fck outta here.”

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