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Years ago, I used to live in an apartment. I came home one night to see that my neighbor’s apartment appeared to have been broken into while he was out of town. The front door had been kicked in. I called 911. The operator told me that it was a busy night, a burglary of an unoccupied dwelling was low priority, and it would therefore be an hour or so before police would arrive.

I told them that I understood, described what I was wearing, told the operator that I would be clearing the apartment of any criminals with my firearm, and asked her to relay that to responding officers, so that I wouldn’t be shot.

Less than five minutes later, 6 officers arrived, lights and sirens on. I got the standard lecture about taking the law into my own hands. I told them that SOMEONE has to stop criminals, and since they were busy writing reports of crimes that were over, the people themselves would stop crime.

They were not amused.

It looks like the citizens of Asheville, NC will be having to do the same for themselves. Here are ten crimes that the Asheville police will stop responding to:

  • Theft under $1,000 where there is no suspect information (this does not include stolen vehicles or guns)
  • Theft from a vehicle where there is no suspect information
  • Minimal damage and/or graffiti to property where there is no suspect information
  • Non-life-threatening harassing phone calls (does not include incidents that are related to domestic violence and/or stalking)
  • Fraud, scams, or identity theft
  • Simple assaults that are reported after they have occurred
  • Reports that do not require immediate police actions and/or enforcement (information only reports)
  • Funeral escorts
  • Lost/found property
  • Trespassing where the property owner does not want to press charges
  • In addition, noise complaints made during normal business hours and after-hours may have a significant delay in response‚Ķ

7 replies on “No one available”

There is an old joke. Man wakes up to see somebody breaking into his garden shed. He calls 911. and reports the crime happening NOW.

Dispatcher says that there is nobody available.

Dude hangs up.

5 minutes later, he calls back, tells the dispatcher that there is no hurry. But that he has shoot the two robbers.

5 minutes later the cops arrive in time to arrest two people emptying the shed.

Sargent comes over to the home owner.

“I thought you said you shoot them.”

“I thought you said there was nobody available.”

I watched a friend’s place in the nearest big city while she was away attending to a sick parent. Wound up cleaning off some nasty graffiti (fortunately it was mostly on a window so easier to clean) and a broken fence gate. Neither time did the police bother coming out. On the graffiti they told me to just fill out an online form. (!)

I cannot tell you what disdain this engendered in me towards that city’s police, and expect it would be moreso if I lived there.

Asheville will be an interesting experiment to watch. It’s basically a large hippy village, liberal to the extreme. Lots of small shops, restaurants, etc.

With police doing the “blue stepback” it’s reasonable to expect minor crime to increase, followed by an increase in less-than-minor crimes as the BGs see opportunity. No indication yet if prosecution will also step back, but they’ll certainly have less to do if arrests fall.

The citizens’ response to all this will be interesting to watch.

Hell, I had an accident on a major secondary street here and since no one was hurt, the city’s finest couldn’t be bothered. We waited a half hour or so, exchanged info and f-ed off back home. Get a dashcam, take pics.

Two words come to mind. Weapons Free. Why even call?

Won’t be long before stores have armed security. Also won’t be long before if there’s a store at all in the hood, you’ll be asking for what you need at a counter with bulletproof glass and an intercom.

That’s when the progs will moan about lack of services and food deserts totally clueless as to why this happened.

I called and got that same “we’ll be there when we get there” line. An alarm was going off in my shop with several classic cars parked inside. I was already on the road home when ADT called. I relayed to the police through them my vehicle and what I was wearing. I ended the call with “homeowner is armed”. I was 5 minutes out during this call. They rolled through my automatic security gate right behind me. Fastest response ever. I figured they came so fast more to protect the bad guy, than me and mine…interesting that.

Had issues with my city that resulted in a lawsuit that never went to trial. Attorney called it unlawful conversion of property. Anyhow, City had taken up some of my land and was running a pump 24/7 that kept me awake at night. Called in a noise complaint and City essentially said it could not be bothered. I told the dispatcher don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of it myself. I think I had three police cars and half a dozen officers role in heavy minutes after I got off that call. Truly, the police cannot be bothered unless they think someone is going to do their job for them.

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