I was selected for a random drug test for work. I was given 24 hours to go to a third party lab for testing.

The lab had me empty my pockets into a lock box for the drug test. When I pulled out a gun and put it in the box, the look on that woman’s face was priceless.

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BobF · November 7, 2022 at 4:24 pm

But no bonus points unless she fainted. 🙂

Bad Dancer · November 7, 2022 at 5:29 pm

Is it a CYA thing that they can’t do it at your work and were you able to keep a straight face while watching her reaction?

    Divemedic · November 7, 2022 at 7:13 pm

    I think they use 3rd party so someone can’t have a friend rig the test

Danny · November 7, 2022 at 6:24 pm

Excellent! You got the brass balls.

I would have left the side arm in my vehicle.

J. Smith · November 7, 2022 at 7:59 pm

DM, most of my docs, oops that got spelt dics, i shouldnt have corrected it, lab corp and quest have no carry signs on their doors. Not sayin or asking where you went but good on you sue me mfers. Good thing my counselors office doesnt have that policy, id be fooked😂

    Divemedic · November 7, 2022 at 8:16 pm

    In Florida, you can put up signs like that, but they don’t mean shit. I ignore them and carry anyway.

anonymous coward · November 8, 2022 at 12:44 am

Took broke gun to fedex to mail to producer. What’s in the box? A firearm for repair. Woman literally runs in to the back yelling – he gotta a gun, he gotta a gun. Then from the back I hear an older mans voice, very calm. Is it in a box and sealed? yes…. We ship guns all the time maybell – go up there and accept the package.

Paulb · November 8, 2022 at 7:47 am

I’m on a friendly basis with our in-house whiz quizmaster. He’s an ex-navy chief, so he’s been there, done that, and my watch partner is an ex-navy corpsman, another lifer, so sometimes when he’s soliciting donations (he hates when I say that), they’ll talk lab talk shop and I’ll accuse them of saving the samples to make afternoon cocktail mixers and things like that. On top of in-house randoms, we also get 3rd party randoms at work and also demands for 3rd party randoms at a doc-in-the-box while we’re on home leave. The US DOT is awful pee-centric, but from what I can see, over-the-road guys don’t get picked on near as much as tugboat trash.

TRX · November 8, 2022 at 5:53 pm

I worked for a place like that once. We worked across weekends, so our days off were during the week, so they always scheduled their lab visists to happen on our time, not theirs. And it was a 40-mile drive each way, and with paperwork and just-because-we-can waiting, it took half a day.

I turned in a ticket for four hours’ reimbursement. They laughed. I’d spread the word; half a dozen other people wanted to be paid, too. And then I mentioned I’d be contacting the state labor department unless I got a check Real Soon Now.

Amazingly, they paid up. The company’s owners were in a different state, and probably the furor rolled far enough uphill the principals weren’t sure about their powers as employers, so they paid the trivial amounts rather than going to court or arbitration.

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