I keep seeing the meme that the “average American commits 3 felonies a day” just by going about their daily routine. I got to thinking that despite the book, there is no evidence that this is a fact. Sure, there IS that book, but I read it, and all it contained was a few anecdotal stories about people getting busted for obscure felonies. Just how easy is it to commit a felony?

1 If you are using a household cleaner, and the label tells you to mix a cap full of the cleaner with a gallon of water, and you only mix it with 3.5 quarts of water, you have just used a labeled product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling. Felony.

2 In Texas, it is a felony to own more than 4 sex toys (chapter 43). 11 of
the 2,324 acts that the Texas Legislature thinks are worthy of being
called felonies, have to do with acts that you can commit with or to an
oyster.

3 In Montana It is a felony for a wife to open her husband’s mail.

4 In Florida, it is a felony to access WiFi without permission. There was a
man who was convicted in 2005 of using the WiFi of a restaurant that advertised free WiFi for customers, because he was using the access from the parking lot while the establishment was closed. Since it was advertised as free WiFi for customers, and he could not be a customer while the business was closed, hello felony.

5 It’s a felony to have a raffle in Georgia, unless you are registered as a non-profit organization with the state.

6 In Michigan, it is a felony for a man to seduce an unmarried woman, punishable by 5 years in prison. Adultery is also a felony in Michigan, but only if the spouse being cheated on is the one who complained.

7 In Mississippi, if you promise to marry a woman, have sex with her, and then decide not to marry, you are guilty of a felony punishable by ten years in prison.

While I cannot find any proof of the “three felonies a day” rule, I can certainly believe that it is possible.

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