Having solved all of this nation’s problems, the Executive decides to fix the problem of handicapped restroom access on aircraft:
Prepare to see airfares increase to cover the cost of retrofitting all of the aircraft with handicapped restrooms. Now I know that many of you will say “I don’t fly, anyhow” but that isn’t the point. The point here is that the limousine liberals of the left want to be the only ones who can afford to travel, eat at nice restaurants, and go on vacations. They can’t stand the fact that poor people have access to the things that they have. It isn’t that they are really concerned about the environment or about carbon emissions. No, they want to make sure that the elites are the only ones who have access to luxuries like getting on an airplane. After all, you can’t be an elite if just anyone can fly off to Bali or the French Riviera.
Andrew Wilkow has a theory that the only reason why the left is opposed to capitalism and rich people is because they can’t stand knowing that ordinary people have access to luxuries that only the important people should have. After all, what’s the point of being a VIP if anyone could do what you do or have what you have? He calls this theory his “Everyman a King” theory.